mild-clouds:

i want to listen to music, drink coffee (+ a bit vodka) and forget the world

  • Interviewer: What are three words that describe you?
  • Me: Boss Ass Bitch

interstellarmage:

i knew this guy in middle school who when asked about his future plans, even by school counselors or teachers would without fail always chant,

KICK ASS, GO TO SPACE
REPRESENT THE HUMAN RACE

i wonder what he’s up to these days.

poshxspice:

subject13fringe:

montypythonandtheholyblog:

today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket 

image

today on satan makes a blog post

definited:

ever wonder how different your life would be if that one thing never happened

i can’t imagine someone ever looking at me and getting butterflies that just doesn’t happen

(Source: n0vi)

pornhubhemmo:

Imagine watching an episode of Catfish and seeing someone use your pictures to catfish someone else

shouldnt:

shouldnt:

MOTHER OF JESUS DID YOU GUYS HEAR ABOUT THE GUY WHOSE LEFT SIDE WAS CUT OFF?!?

hes all right now

lol-esbian:

love & lesbos ☻♡

lol-esbian:

love & lesbos ☻♡

(Source: lesbian-and-skate)

  • me in other people's showers: what the fuck is going on